Summary: Everyone has dreams but few
people make them come true. New Business Mentor, Leah Grant, outlines the typical excuses
people make and how to defeat them so that you can make your dreams come true.
You've been talking about pursuing your dream since high
school. You've been stuffing a file with places you'd like to travel since you got your
first job. You've envisioned what your boutique store would look like for years, even
driving around searching for the perfect location, yet you've never taken that next step.
So, what's stopping you?
In my coaching with clients they regularly share the
obstacles that are stopping them from moving forward. At least fifty percent of the time,
these items are perceived, not real.
Here's a list of the most popular ones I've heard and how
to avoid them:
1. I'm too old.
Years ago I heard the story of a 70-year-old woman who
lifted a car off her grandchild and saved his life. When she was interviewed, instead of
being ecstatic, she was melancholy and admitted that if she could lift a car to save a
child what else might she have been able to do that she never tried. The interviewer asked
her what she'd always wanted to do, but hadn't tried. The grandma replied, "Go to
college." The interviewer challenged her, "So why not do it now?" And so
she did.
You are only too old if YOU decide you are. There are lots
of stories of older Olympians, older singers and older musicians-fields typically
associated with youth.
2. It costs too much money.
I have found that most people who make this statement
actually have no idea what the item in questions costs. They are operating on some notion
that it's above what they would be willing to spend. Or they are not open to creative
solutions and assume that they must pay retail for what they want-be it a new car, travel,
or a house. There are many innovative ways to get what you want (and no, they aren't
illegal!)
Don't make this statement unless you know the exact cost
and have made the decision that the cost for the value isn't there.
3. My spouse/children/parents/etc. wouldn't like it.
I'm surprised to hear adults say this statement, but I hear
it more often than one might imagine. First, you really don't know how someone will react
until you actually take an action. In most cases, you are speculating as to how they would
react or assuming they will react similar to ways they have in the past.
Second, are you living your life to make them happy or to
make you happy? Of course, if you have a family you need to consider how your choices
affect them, but not to the point that if they may be uncomfortable with your choice you
give it up without seeking a compromise or resolution.
4. It's too hard.
This statement is another one that is usually based on
incomplete information or full out speculation. You don't know how difficult something
will be for you unless you try it. Nothing is impossible.
Stop pushing what you want away until you decide you don't
want it anymore.
5. I'm too fat.
- "I'm too fat to go out to networking meetings and
market myself. Who would want to hire me?"
- "I'm too fat to take professional photos for my
website."
- "I'm too fat to get a date. No one will ever want to
marry me."
Admittedly, I've heard these declarations from women far
more than men, but a few of my male clients have said it too in reference to why they
think they may have gotten passed over for a promotion or not getting hired for a new job.
While I won't say that weight discrimination may not be at
play in some cases, the bigger obstacle is how you feel about yourself.
If you believe that you are fat and feel self-conscious you
will present yourself differently. When you aren't confident and someone else is-they will
likely get the date or the job over you.
6. I'm not educated enough.
Bill Gates quit college before earning his degree. There
are countless stories of high school children who have opened businesses that have hit a
million in sales.
Education doesn't equal success.
If what you want to do requires a higher level degree than
what you possess, figure out a way to get it.
7. I'm too <insert word or phrase> OR I'm not
<insert word or phrase>.
Are you seeing a pattern here? Search your language and see
if you're shutting yourself down by believing in a perceived obstacle.
If you are, stop now and go take an action to pursue your
dream. These obstacles do not need to stop you from achieving success and fulfillment in
life.
Think about the grandma who said that if she could do
something she thought impossible at age 70, what else could she have done in her life,
then ask yourself, "What could I do if only believed I could?"
© 2009 Leah Grant Enterprises LLC |
